dear janet jackson,
you look amazing.
i wish i could send you a “congrats on your weight-loss” or “i’m sure you’re happy to have the fat police off your back” or “i’ve adored you always but i totally get it” gift, but i only know how to show love with warm, fat-filled, sugary treats or inappropriate touching. so, i’m using my words:
congratulations and i wish you all the best. i hope you’re the happiest you’ve ever been. you look it.
your unwavering ‘stan’ since birth yours truly,